Toasting the End of Amatonormativity

Note:

I noticed this was removed from library.inu.red at some point (presumably also removed from The Anarchist Library). Personally I found it to be a fantastic read, and was frustrated when it could no longer be found. As far as I know it's not anywhere on the Geminispace, and happens to be hard to find on the world wide web. I believe it also poses some interesting questions given its age, and I also happen to partially disagree with some parts of it.

Credits to Trevor Hultner

October 24th, 2014

Throughout the decades, the anarcha-queer project has kept the goals of sexual and gender liberation alive among the prevalent discussions of class, capital and culture in the anarchist milieu. In their same vein, we who identify as asexual and aromantic anarchists aim to spark discussion, dialogue and action around the goal of dismantling amatonormativity and its benefactors, kyriarchy and capitalism.

As anarchists, our ultimate desire is for a brighter, freer and more just future. As aromantic and asexual individuals, our desire is for a world free from sex as a rite of passage and a prerequisite to full and unvarnished personhood and more receptive to diverse forms of love and intimacy outside the romantic realm.

Critics of asexual and aromantic visibility often levy the accusation that we are pining for attention as unique, special snowflakes. According to our detractors, we see the issues that face asexual and aromantic individuals, especially adolescents, as somehow being more important than issues facing transgender teens, or bisexual, gay and lesbian individuals. We stand accused of playing the ultimate game of identity politics.

In reality, anyone who has been involved in visibility efforts for the aro, ace and agender community - regardless of whether they are anarchist - knows the truth: the negative patterns of behavior that are occasionally directed at us adversely affect everyone else, as well. When you realize that amatonormativity - “the assumption that a central, exclusive, amorous relationship is normal for humans, in that it is a universally shared goal, and that such a relationship is normative, in the sense that it should be aimed at in preference to other relationship types” - is informed primarily by cisnormativity and heteropatriarchy, it doesn’t take long to adopt a hard stance against those social norms.

This should not be misconstrued, however; we are not interested in an attack on sex qua sex. We know that sexual experiences and relationships can be intensely meaningful to those who participate in them. Likewise, our interest is not to dismantle romantic love as such. Unlike the rest of the asexual and aromantic visibility communities, however, we are not interested in merely raising up alternative forms of relationships while leaving the existing status quo untouched. If we are being honest, there will never be a time under the current order where things like queerplatonic relationships will be taken as seriously as monogamous relationships based purely on sexual and romantic attraction *as expressed in a way that does not upset patriarchy, gender binaries or models of consent that resemble work contracts.* No, we are instead rather interested in taking the whole motherfucker apart.

So this is a toast: to the end of amatonormativity, and all destructive hierarchies everywhere.

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